Men & women
Smoking
I have never smoked and I find that being around a person who smokes is very unpleasant.I don't understand why a woman who has never smoked will state in her profile that she will accept a man who smokes. I am now happily married and I am not looking for a woman. But when I see that a woman will accept a man who smokes, I form the opinion that she is foolish and willing to accept smoke in her future home as the price to pay for a man. She wants a husband more than she wants a pleasant home. This causes me to think that she lacks courage and prejudices me against her as a woman who can be a good wife!
If you state in your profile that you don't want a person who smokes, you will probably lose the opportunity to be married to a man who smokes. But you will gain the respect of men who don't smoke. You might encourage a man who does smoke, to quit smoking! Thank about it!!!
Arina
Уважаемый Peter!
Стимулировать мужчину, чтобы он бросил курить------это всё будет замечательно и хорошо.
Но!!!! Стимулировать и убеждать можно мужчину, который искренне заинтересован в тебе.
Уговаривать не курить неизвестного мужчину после двух месяцев переписки-----будет печальный итог и отказ.
Да, я убедила мужчину бросить курить. Долго, трудно убеждала......Но он бросил и не курит 4 года
Уважаемый Peter!
Принимая мужчину который курит, женщина всего лишь принимает его таким как есть, с его недостатками. Взамен надеясь, что мужчина примет какой-то недостаток в ней. Вы слишком идеализируете людей, а особенно женщин. Идеальных людей не бывает! У вас завышенные требования к женщинам, но это чисто ваше мнение.
Никак не сделаешь не курящими. Моя дочь не любит спиртное ,но курит и уже много лет. Начала с того ,что кто-то ей внушил ,что она похудеет и все. Она не бросит никогда-такое ее заявление. Ей попадаются не курящие мужчины ,которые тоже начинают "дымить"..проблема ,которую не решить
Natalya
А я вот не курила, и не курю. И именно поэтому возле меня всегда не курящие люди. Питер-Вы всё верно говорите. Каждый человек для себя решает сам. Но не стоит ради денег, или ещё чего-то- наступать на горло своему здоровью и своим жизненным принципам. Надо в первую же очередь уважать себя. И свой выбор.
Julia
А Я ТОЖЕ НИКОГДА НЕ КУРИЛА. НО ВСЕ МОИ ПОДРУГИ КУРЯТ . БЫВШИЙ УУЖ КУРИЛ. НО ЭТО НЕ ЗНАЧИТ ЧТО Я НЕ УВАЖАЮ СЕБЯ. ЭТО ЛИЧНЫЙ ВЫБОР КАЖДОГО.
Olga
"I form the opinion that she is foolish and willing to accept smoke in her future home as the price to pay for a man. She wants a husband more than she wants a pleasant home". // Прямо-таки "foolish", как будто не мужчины (женщины-викарии идут уже за ними в фарватере) в своем большинстве культивируют этот самый образ "идеальной женщины", удобный для них, - образ женщины, готовой платить любую цену за то, чтобы быть с мужчиной.
А те мужчины, которым действительно нужна женщина с самостоятельным мышлением и своим мнением, не станут бросать в женщин такие вот камни-упреки, потому что достаточно мудры, чтобы увидеть, откуда у проблемы растут ноги, и такие мужчины не будут заниматься виктимблеймингом.
Hello))) Very interesting questioned. I, too, had never smoked, but in my life I inherited male smokers smoking colleagues, friends smoke.
I do not know how do I make non-smokers or refuse to communicate with them ???
Hello Nadezhda, We have no choice but to accept the people in our lives that smoke. In my opinion your will attract a man who doesn't smoke by putting, "Never" in the answer to whether you will accept a man who smokes. If a man writes to you, who smokes, you will do him a favor by telling him that smoking is not something that you want in your home. Perhaps, you will do him a favor to give him an additional reason to stop smoking. My friend Stanley, smokes. His father smoked for all of his life until he got emphysema. Only then did his father quit smoking. I tell Stanley, "Why wait until you are seriously ill to stop smoking when you know that someday you will have to stop?"
Hello Helga, I believe that a person who wants to marry, is best to seek the approval of the opposite sex. If a person does not care about the approval of the opposite sex, then they are better to have friends of the opposite sex, but not to marry. Please note that I did not make my comment gender specific. What I say applies to men and to women.
Peter
Hello Marina, My comment is about choosing to communicate with a person who does or doesn't smoke. If you already know a person who smokes and then you fall in love with them; that is an entirely different matter.
Peter
Hello Nadezhda, You can't do anything about what you inherit. If were single and a woman who smoked contacted me; I would be tactful and speak of her good qualities but tell her that I am not looking for a woman who smokes. I might do her a favor. She might consider that good men who don't smoke are not interested in women who smoked and have a reason to quit smoking. In my 79 years I have never met a person who enjoyed smoking. They all know that they should quit smoking but they don't have the strength to quit smoking. I have known alcoholics and heroin addicts who could quit their alcohol and heroin but were unable to stop smoking. In my opinion, people or companies that promote smoking are criminals.
When I was single, I never contacted a woman who smoked. Even if she was very desirable in other ways.
Peter
Hello Sofya, Thank you for your honesty and candor. And I add that when a woman's skin degrades from smoking, she looks in the mirror and has an additional reason to quit smoking.
Peter
Peter, I kissed a girl years ago, who smoked. She was really pretty, but it was like kissing an ash tray! Last time for me!
Olga, dear. Peter's position is irrelevant! (Who cares?)
I just tried to implement the principle he suggested. From something in mind to something in kind.
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