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Fernando, 38 y.o.

Mexico

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How we men react on social media.

Here are some advices I want to give. Cause I believe there's many people here really trying to find a special one. But many came to the social media thinking the "usual" method applies here and It's not true. So I want to try to help a bit the women that really want to find their man to understand how men psychology works on the social media.



1. Men will always look to your profile photo and your photos first. If he likes you he will go down to read.
2. After finding you attractive. The first thing a man will read is your age. And your actual state. If you have kids or not. So always be honest about writing if you have children or not. Cause once communication starts and you tell the man you have kids(without putting this in your profile) the relationship will not work. The man will think you're a lier from the beginning. Same If you tell him you're still married, or in the process of divorce, etc.
3. After that, the man will look for your answers to the questions. Woman. I understand many of you think answering the questions is boring. Well, a man that truly matters will not seriously write you or he won't write you at all If you don't answer to the detail to the questions(otherwise the man will unconsciously see you as a non serious woman and someone not trustable).
4. Next thing will be the critic part. What will happen if the man thinks you're interesting?
Case 1: The man will automatically analyze your answers to the questions. And maybe he will add you to his favorites(So don't be mad If a man do this without communicating to you first). Usually it's an instintive action that we men think acts like telling to the girl we like her. But without being so direct like clicking on the show interest button.
Case 2: The man will not add you to his favorites but will click on the show interest button and nothing else. He won't write you at all.
Case 3: The man adds you to his favorites and writes.
Case 4: The man writes you only.

*Note. All of this cases apply only for people that can write to others by owning a Gold or Platinum membership of course. So always look if that person has that kind of membership or not before judging him.

I'll try to explain each of the cases In the best possible way.

Case 1. If the man adds you to his favorites and he doesn't write and you realize this. If you like that man. Look how many times he has visited you. Here I'm going to tell you a secret about us. Many men are comfortable talking to others in business meetings or work or even more with friends and at same time they can't talk to the women as much as others. It's not that those men are not succesful or insecure. They're just not experienced on doing it and sometimes they fear to do it. And even on social media there's people that fears to talk to a beautiful woman thinking they'll be rejected. And usually those men gets worried that much cause they don't talk to many women. They usually find only one or 2 girls to talk with and they fear to be rejected because of it. So women. Don't be affraid of giving the first step by talking to the man if you see that man has already visited your profile 2, 3 or more times. There's a 90% of probability that man is only a bit affraid to talk to you. Make the first step, be honest and be yourself. If you do it the man will not think you're an easy girl. Write him you find out he's watching your profile and you think that's sweet from him. You'll see the positive reaction after that.

Case 2. Some men will click on the show interest button and will not write. This has 2 ways: The man is going from profile to profile or the man is truly interested but he's affraid. Again look how many times he have been visiting your profile. In case the man visited you only once and doesn't write. That man It's evaluating options before writing. That doesn't mean he's not on the site for something serious. So give a look to his profile and if you think he's interesting. Write to him. He'll be surprised and will give you attention. You'll find out if he's serious or not.

Case 3. If a man does this 90% of time It means he likes how you look but also he likes your profile and he'll feel comfortable to talk to you. But if you have no answers to questions be 100% sure he likes how you look only and the man will always be uncertain about you and your personality no matter what you tell him. This is why writing honest answers to the quetsions is THE MOST IMPORTANT thing to do here.

Case 4. If a man writes just like that. If you're interested on him then start with this phrase: I'm glad to get your message. I want to talk to you so tell me. Why did you decide to write to me? Look at his reaction and you'll know If he's serious or not.

I hope this will give you all women an idea of how to deal with communication here. Remember: This is not 100% accurate. I hope this won't offend anyone. But I'm honest as a man and I wanted to share a different perspective so women can have more tools to find their special one.

Good luck ladies. You deserve love. Never forget it.

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Tetiana, 52 y.o.

Poland

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Reply to Galina on View the commented comment

Спасибо, что на собственном примере показали разницу менталитетов.
Вьі делаете так, мужчина делает иначе.
Но Вьі воспринимаете блок так, как бьі поступили Вьі. Т.е., Вьі блокируете только когда негатив к человеку. Именно того же ждете от другого человека, именно так оцениваете действия другого.
Єто как раз о таких случаях говорят: не ровняй всех по себе.
Вам блок - обида и неприятность потому что Вьі, блокируя, хотите доставить неприятность и обидеть собеседника. И если Вьі єтого не осознаете, а уверенньі что никого обижать не хотите а просто избавляете себя от надоедьі, то Вьі или обманьіваете себя, или пока не разобрались в механизме отзеркаливания внутреннего на внешнем.
А девчата, кому пофиг кто там их блокирует, точно так же относятся спокойно и нейтрально к блокировке своего визави.


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Galina

Reply to Tetiana on View the commented comment

Искренне радует , что у вас изменился менталитет ! Это огромный плюс . Обычно наши люди не развиваются и остаются со своими взглядами даже прожив много лет в другой стране .

"Но Вьі воспринимаете блок так, как бьі поступили Вьі. Т.е., Вьі блокируете только когда негатив к человеку." Фантазия у вас не хуже Кира Булычева . Какой может быть негатив к незнакомым мне людям в интернете ? Ну зашёл он на страницу моего профиля и зашёл .


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Nadine


Касаемо блокировки . Я удивлена ,потому что такого со мной никогда не было , и я об этом не слышала от других участниц , чтобы блокировали даже не начав общаться. Никаких оскорбительных цитат и фото у меня нет . Конечно , хотелось бы понимать причину .
Татьяна ,объяснила , что таким образом меня исключили из повторного просмотра ,не хотят время тратить на повторный кастинг ))) На большинстве ресурсов "блокировка "используется ,именно чтобы исключить неприятного оппонента ,или чтобы навредить ему , анкету могут удалить за большое количество блокировок. Надеюсь ,что мне больше не встретятся такие радикалы. Не буду забивать себе голову.

Хочется уже начать интересное общение ,но, как Татьяна указала в своем списке " умный",а я бы дополнила- "живой ум", к сожалению очень мало такого мужского контингента на сайте .


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Marina

Reply to Nadine on View the commented comment

Блокировка это, чтобы кто-то не писал, не подмигивал, открытки не слал. На поиск не влияет. Если кто-то к кому-то заходит, так и будет заходить, хотите вы или они этого или нет. По-моему не надо внимание обращать, разве угадаешь, что у этого мужчины в голове. Может, чтобы вы в будущем ему знаки внимания не послали, так же и он уже вам не пошлёт.


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Nadine

Reply to Marina on View the commented comment

Ага, ясно. работа на опережение. Ну и пофиг,что я и не собиралась писать, подмигивать,заглядывать. Щас сяду и заблокирую не глядя всех кто не входит в заданные мной границы поиска. А так на всякий случай.
Глупо это . Блокировать нужно за определенные действия.
Но я уже писала ,что меня это не тронуло,а удивило и пишу я это тем( мужчинам) кто на ус мотает.  


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Tatyana


Интересно,а как быть с большинством мужчин на сайте которые срывают свой возраст и то,что они женаты?????? Как быть когда они знакомятся и позже выясняется этот момент???? С точки зрения мужчины как вы это объясните???


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Gideon


I hope that you are not serious and all that you are writing is just a joke or a sign to get some attention.
On the other hand I always believe in aliens form another planet and you are definately from another planet. Anyway good luck with the searh in the Universe

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Talia🐝, 44 y.o.

Ukraine

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Reply to Galina on View the commented comment

Галина, дякую навзаєм 
Я рада, що у Вас складаються відносини з чудовим достойним Вас чоловіком.
"занадто гарний для мене" - хіба ж це причина, щоб відмовляти чоловікові  

Щодо блокування, то, я все таки надалі утримаюсь, бо бачу, що ставлення до блоку не у всіх людей однакове. 


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Galina

Reply to Talia🐝 on View the commented comment

Наталія , звичайно, у всіх людей не буде єдиної думки . Але я занотувала вашу думку стосовно блоку . Це дійсно зберігає час  


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Galina


Этот пост был написан от чистого сердца, и, очевидно, молодой человек искреннен и хотел поделиться своими мыслями. Зачем этот негатив, не нравится- не читайте, а кому- то могут приходиться его заметки.

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Fernando, 38 y.o.

Mexico

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Reply to Tatyana on View the commented comment

A man or a woman that lies from the beginning will never deserve your attention. How can I explain this? It's pretty easy. Every human being is born with the "code" to lie to others to survive in different situations or to avoid getting in trouble. But the real issue is more complex than this. There's many people here looking for flirting, finantial support, sugar daddys(or mommys), etc. only. So to every women here. Be open to make a video calling and inssist to the man to do this even If you don't speak english very well. It's easier to find out If a man is lying this way.

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Fernando, 38 y.o.

Mexico

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Reply to Gideon on View the commented comment

This is for women to get more clues about us in social media. Though I understand people like you can get to feel "exposed". But Don't worry about it. Believe i yourself. Good luck.

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Fernando, 38 y.o.

Mexico

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Reply to Galina on View the commented comment

Thank you for your words Galina. I can't say I own a pure heart because I believe in balance between everything I am. But this post was certainly made from my heart to try to help every women on the site to get to find a bit of answers about us(men). Of course things would be really different if everybody had the will to be themselves in life. But social media is really different than real life. So I wanted to help people understand the differences between these concepts. Wish you the best of luck. You're very beautiful and kind and I really like your cat. Hugs.


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Galina

Reply to Fernando on View the commented comment

Thank you Fernando. You are a delicate, polite and well-mannered man. And I also like you because you like my cat.

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