Less than 2 weeks ago, I joined your club.

Less than 2 weeks ago, I joined your club. Everyone is kind; even dear Tomasso has been kind and friendly. I’ve met many pleasant, bright and beautiful women. I use the forums for the same reasons one would go to a party: to meet others, to see how they think, to gain exposure and interact with others on the road to finding a life partner; at least for the short time some believe I may have left. :) At a party, I tend to talk more than most, laugh and have fun. Nothing is different here. Should be no surprise that some men write long messages so ladies can evaluate how he may think. That doesn’t always mean we believe we are the center of the universe. That is simply a method of reaching out, and sometimes that is awkward. What did you expect? At a party, I don’t talk serious relationships with womam; I try to be friendly and polite. How could I possibly know if a girl is someone I may wish to spend the rest of my life with? That takes time, and certainly so in a guarded, careful, on-line situation where even little misunderstandings quickly end further exploration. Are you such a good psychologist as you believe? Ladies, you know nothing more about a man after several short letters than you do after 5 minutes at a party. Only advantage; at a party you can tell he wears ugly suits, and that is correctable. Are you annoyed then, a man would write a long letter? Is he conceited when he tries to share an honest and fair understanding? Do you imagine more negative qualities in his first letters than what exist? Some make judgments based only an immediate perceived dislike; a decision even a professional psychologist would never make. My son traveled on a national show tour with a group of young people. One particular girl and he did not mix well at all. She said, Karl, I don’t like you! He snapped back, I don’t like you, either! Funny how they’re now happily married, living in Kentucky, very much in love. Sometimes people don’t give themselves a proper chance. This is simply my perspective,(but what do I know?) Many decisions appear to be made quickly and without good reason. Considering all that can go badly in a real-life situation; I’m amazed anyone ever falls in love with all the complications (e.g., language, culture, age, female vs. male thinking, distance, etc.) related to on-line. I would never even judge Tomasso harshly based on our short conversations here. How can some ladies quickly discard a potential soul mate based on such little knowledge? If a woman is attractive, I don’t care if she is agnostic and I am a believer; as you learn about each other, people change. No one knows who I am simply because I am a believer. Even the definition in our 2 cultures is completely different. Besides, we change each other through interaction, and thus grow. Those who don’t, spend years on sites like this in a cycle that never improves. I don't foresee that for myself. I’ve observed much regarding men’s looks, age, and many other issues. Girls, not every man is Tom Cruise. (Some of us are better! :) ) The truth is, you wouldn’t want Tom Cruise; none of his wives liked him, either! You simply think he is handsome. By the way, Katie Holmes was far younger and didn't leave him because of his age, she left because he was what we call a jerk! My reason to be here; American women are spoiled, especially by your standards. Many have totally unrealistic and unreasonable expectations; no man can make them happy. Why many divorces; easier for men to have the milk without having to own the cow. (I don’t allow myself the option of buying milk.) Don’t short-change yourselves; give yourselves and the men a fair opportunity. Many men fail here because they arrogantly believe they can pick and choose from a never-ending parade of attractive women, and discard countless wonderful possibilities. They are shocked to discover Russian women are not nearly as desperate as they first believed. They then get frustrated, blame the women, saying they lie, are fat, one green eye and one blue, blah, blah, blah, when the problem is themselves and poor decisions. Don’t you ladies make the same bad decisions. Keep it realistic and don’t cut yourselves short. Many good men here. The youth of a beautiful woman may fade with age, but never in the eyes of a man who chose you for the right reasons. Choose him for the right reason, but take time to discover it.