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Mb

Strong man

Most of the women dating description/texts leads to the concept of "reliable" "strong" man. Whatever are the rest of the quest and its romantism.
I'm wondering why East man looks so "weak" / "idealized when strong" ?. I never saw a dating description seeking for "strong" man before reaching East dating sites. I thinks i use internet since it is widelly availabile, year 2000.

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Lyuba, 63 y.o.

Russia

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Most Eastern women idealize European men.. 


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Billy


Strong is code for knowing our roles... Slavic women have seen that feminism has led to a blurring of gender roles in the western world and that isn't what they want. While many of the Eastern women may appreciate the Euro/Westernized males social evolution in many ways they don't want us forgetting that at the end of the day we are still the man and that the man has obligations. They don't want to be splitting bills, making all the decisions etc. Many of them want modern sensibilities with old school values. At least that's how I've come to interpret the word thru my interactions.


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Yuliya


Подобный вопрос задавал Кen, в разделе "Прошу совета"
"You say you want a 'Strong' man"  

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Natalya, 47 y.o.

Ukraine

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“Strong and reliable” Maybe in other words she wants to say - If I come to you in a foreign country, without knowledge of the language, familiar people, familiar surroundings, can I rely on you?   And in our country, our women mostly rely only on themselves.

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Natalia, 53 y.o.

Russia

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Reply to Billy on View the commented comment

Вы правы!


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Elena


Европейские женщины-сильные духом женщины)))Это-львицы)))
Поэтому они хотят встретить "Льва")))


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Mb

Reply to Billy on View the commented comment

Sure. I understand the idea. But I'm far from being sure that such deeply shared requirement is addressed to only West guys as i'm pretty sure that East women are no more fundamentally strong that West ones. It is indeed all about social codes and constraints. In our still man man man world, I'm thinking about the issue seen by East women with East men . Internet is of no help, only caricaturing them as drunken illeterate bad boys . According to my own experience they should have a relative success in West dating sites full of normalized boring mens.
I don't think the requirement come from West (over?) femnism, it come from East own expérience of the modernity. So the question is are East men such unreliable and weak ?


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Mb

Reply to Elena on View the commented comment

Great to know that East is full if lioness. I know myself and I'm unable to last with an weak personnality women. We use to call them with an equivalent of the American term "bimbo". I'm personnaly convinced that feminism as it started in 70" was a progress and now women status declined to a sexual object first in America then in Europe.


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Mb

Reply to Natalya on View the commented comment

Would be nice but no I think it's more a social determism than an individual tradeoff.


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Billy

Reply to Mb on View the commented comment

It is not that Eastern men are weak I think it is the opposite and that strength is the quality they like of their men and want to see in other men. It may be other qualities and mindsets they are less keen on in their own local men. If these Eastern Euro women were on a local dating site with fellow Russians/Ukranians etc they likely wouldn't say I want a strong man as they would assume most of the local men already know what is expected of them but they would emphasize what they feel is less represented. Here on this site with this audience, they are focusing on the quality they see lacking. As for why it is lacking, we can debate that but I find it hard not to pin a lot of it on feminism and the ever changing rules on socially acceptable behavior for men. I worry for young boys today, they are being taught virtually every natural instinct they have as boys is wrong, that they're so paralyzed at doing something wrong as to potentially offend or worse they do nothing, it's going to lead to a pandemic of weak ineffectual men if it hasn't already.

`


As for eastern men on dating sites in the west, I have many Slav friends who are in my city, originally from elsewhere. For the most part yes they do quite well initially, they do stand out for being more manly/aggressive what have you than the average local guy but they don't usually have long relationships unless their attitudes are more congruent with the norms here. If they still harbor ideologies of their home countries they can struggle until they meet somebody like minded. I've found most end up going back to their home countries for spouses.


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Mb

Reply to Billy on View the commented comment

By the way the answer is in the "local" dating sites addressing local population. Easy to check if women also seek for the same. Any suggestion for a pure local dating site?


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Yuliya


Вы хотите получить объективный ответ на субъективный запрос/желание/требование. Почему бы Вам не спросить у тех женщин, в анкетах которых указано "сильный"?
В моей анкете стоит "надежный" - положительное духовно-нравственное качество личности, выражающее устойчивость и твёрдость нравственных основ её поведения.
Понять потребности человека/мужчины/женщины не возможно без понимания его личности, а также условий которые ее окружают.
Мое личное мнение:
Я могу сказать, что русских мужчин нельзя назвать слабыми или ненадежными в целом. Но наше общество "пожинает плоды" последствий кризисов 1990-2000 годов. Как следствие, резкая и быстрая смена идеологии. В результате, за короткий промежуток времени изменилась социальная структура общества и очередной "демографический перекос" в сторону женского населения. Также могу сказать, что Россия - огромная страна, где проживает 146 миллионов человек, 190 народов. Поэтому, достаточно сложно дать однозначный ответ  .


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Mb

Reply to Yuliya on View the commented comment

Indeed.
I want to add " all you need is looooove. Love. Love.
aaalllll we need is love " :^)


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Mb

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As I 'm never far away, here is an update ( my own opinion and still the origin of this post )
Not yet checked the said "local" dating sites.
And no, "strength" or "reliability" have never be a social critieria/idealization in any society when dealing with man/women relashionship . This is/seems the current expression of a social conversion/facing when dealing with modernity in some European region . That is. . ... and I'm wondering what is means in a dating view. Internet caricatural explanation may have some deep or hidden reality. I'm personally completelly aware of what the true feminism movment is in the long term and not really subject to its current pace counter discourse and weakness. I'm also not metro sexual and proud of all my viril attributes :^)


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Mb

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Ok."local" sites checked according to my not so infinite means. "East" girls are incredibly using both "naive" references, that is "princess" stories and teenager "love" images while they are also too much realistics. The whole story seems somewhat crazy contradictionnary with its near pure romantism associated to an incredible and no less pure californian materialism. Real life is shitty and East is as crazy as the very far american west ( dont forget that i'm living at the very heart of France, i'm in the sophisticated, advanced and conscionsous historical center of the whole modern world ). At least i have now a near rational theory satisfying my own views of this world and for curious i know what "strong and reliable" really means in it.


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Yuliya

Reply to Mb on View the commented comment

Расскажите свою теорию? 


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Mb

Reply to Yuliya on View the commented comment

Sure.
It's very simple.
Men come from Mar.... more simple
one plausible part have been suggested, about a demographic gap ( didn't checked ). In fact Russia, ukrainia and bielorussia are on the top world wide countries in marriaying stats, but also in divorcing. The current stage of their modernity put women in insecurity, allowing them to divorce without the economic level to have them indeoendant and without having recycled the mariage institution in folklore or history, marrying is still a mn idealized value, which lead to a second hand mariage market and a foreign one. Such pressure on women have to be resolved by a idéalisation of commitment for men. Society van put such high pressure without means on women and both see them fully responsible of their life. Women are idealized as innocent and fragiles princesses.
I deserve a Nobel price for such great and heuristic theory !!


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Mb

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"Strong and reliable" means I'm a princess and it's not going to be my fault if it fails


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Mb

Reply to Mb on View the commented comment

Society can not both put such hight pressures on women ... and see them responsible of failure. The gap have to resolved in an "idealized world" until the same society can give them the economical means in the "real" world of their newly acquired independance. Now I'm think i'm going to work on the East sexual practices , it seems the logical next step.

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Elena, 50 y.o.

Russia

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It’s just about linguistics. We use term strong and reliable man to describe a self-confident character. For me strong man is the man who can care a responsibility for his life. Who is self-confident and who knows who is he, what he wants and reaches his goals. And the one who wants me as a woman to meet his goals (our common goalsб if I accepted these goals as mine).


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Yuliya

Reply to Mb on View the commented comment

Скажите, а Ваша теория построена на основании чего, и сколько времени Вы потратили? Например:
1.Анкеты с сайтов знакомств. Количество? 1, 10, 1000...
2.Есть личный опыт знакомств/отношений/брак.
3.Вы, может быть, жили в России/Украине/Белоруссии. Знаете культурные особенности, традиции, быт.
4.Другие варианты  


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Mb

Reply to Yuliya on View the commented comment

( where are the smiley using a phone on this site? )
Got it.
don't even think to try to challenge me on over intellectualization when I'm not fully drunken.
This is not an experimental scope neither a statical formal result.
This is only and perfectly an incredibely "heuristic" theory. The very core of the word "theory" itself.


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Yuliya

Reply to Mb on View the commented comment

У меня не было такой цели, но спасибо за подсказку  . В некоторых вопросах я действую интуитивно.
Очень часто я слышу жалобы мужчин на то, что им встречаются "принцессы". Так вот "принцессы" - определенный социальный пласт женщин, с определенным мышлением и потребностями. Допустим, Вы из другого социального пласта. Логично, наверное, предположить, что Ваши предпочтения другие (я про женщин). Так в чем проблема? В принцессах? В отсутствии необходимых навыков, чтобы переместиться в социальный пласт, где есть принцессы? Или принцесса/bimbo - это все-таки мечта для мужчины? 


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Mb

Reply to Yuliya on View the commented comment

We are back to the cliche of men coming from a planet and women from another. You switched to an absolutely different both lexical and semantic world of ideas not related with the scientific legitimity of my now recognized "price Nobel " level theory. Let 's say that I'm the usual man complaining about the usual caricatural picture of "princess" . indeed factually I did or sugested the possibility . Wait. S....it. i''m not complaining , I love the princess concept as i'm myself a true Prince !!!!.


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Yuliya

Reply to Mb on View the commented comment

Обычно на форумах " раскручивают тему" в любую сторону/под разными углами, не отходя от сути. Тем и интересен форум...


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Mb

Reply to Yuliya on View the commented comment

Indeed. I forgot to thanks you . :^). You're cute princess . This post flat encephalo would have need the Romanov daughters in several generation as a whole to survive my usual cynism.
But it helped me to setup words and ideas on the confusing topic of East dating sites and their "strange" ( to me) langage


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Yuliya

Reply to Mb on View the commented comment

Если мне в чем-то удалось Вам помочь, всегда пожалуйста. Добро пожаловать на форум.
Действительно - cute, pretty, sweety (мне часто так говорят😉  и т.п., но принцесса - нет.
Есть большая разница между сознательно "пропущенным ударом" и "пропущенным ударом"...


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Mb

Reply to Yuliya on View the commented comment

The yandex translator to English ( i'm also not English native speaker) has produced a really poor or very subtile translation ( normal when it comes to human real life interactions ) That's a pitty as I'm receptive to the yandex history and technologies ( i'm working also on IT and exceptionnally know very detailly what yandex means and come from even if i'm west ) . But here things leads to either an understandable subtile difference between "missed beat" and "missed shot" or a subtile sexualiation-from-a-women not.known and in a very country wich seems to be very standart. Are you sending me ( whathever sexually oriented ) signal using an.internet intercontinental channel ?. This would be crazy inefficient but wonderfully loving pretty ?


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Arnaud

Reply to Mb on View the commented comment

As the same country as you, i entirely understand what you mean. But it is how it is : eastern women do not see things as in France. If you can't figure it out, you 're wasting your time here. Cultural differences exists on this matter. Bonne année et bonne recherche !


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Mb

Reply to Arnaud on View the commented comment

"Meilleurs voeux".. plenty of Love and Giggles.
Looks like you are naively explaining that "East" women are actually different from. .. for instance more westernized women? . Great discovering, very heuristical, such a great that it seems too much "magical" to disclose. That's how I see "it" ^^





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