What is the victim complex and how to get rid of it?

True. 

sacrifices are not done for any recognition. It is part of a human behavior. We become victims, when we try to do things for recognition from the person for whom we did things and they didn't give a damn about what is done. so you go around crying with others. will push you into more pathetic situation only.

Good for you  

True  

The person should also be willing to listen to the others point of view also.

Is it selfishness, it is actually a thrist for recognision. isn't it ?

So good an insight. Really worth the read.  

This is a good discussion. Not a squabble. I dont think she will be offended. I had read many of her posts. After a long time, i got a full day off, and i almost spend the day here in forum. really some good opinions.  

if they have to solve problems better than that, instead of spoon feeding them, make the home the biggest challenge for them to pass a day. This will help them to have a habit of facing problems and expect nothing in return. The children will turn out to be better. Only issue is that they will be strongly opined young adults, so be prepared to bite your tongues as they approach their teens.  

I thought so that you will take in a good manner.   Great

Excellent read.  

Good thinking.

I think even when we are affectionate and loving, we need to learn to be detached also. Easy said than done.

Point well driven in.

Food for thought. But i thought the main topic was slightly else where, but we reached till here. Interesting points.  

Yes. Tasha is not boring. Some to tickle every part of your brain into thinking is good. Otherwise, when we sneeze one day, a brown rusted portion of the unused brain will flow out throught out nose.  

Its ok, but we all had a good read and food for thought. Originals are welcome. But getting different view points to think about, is always good.

I think it is necessary to allow all voices heard. I do engineering designs, but i stand and listen to everything that people might want to say. Because it can stimulate new creativeness and different thought process. I have many times found solutions to certain complex issues, with seemingly stupid or harsh dissent comments. I have remained grateful to all the feedbacks I get.

I am not worried about what others say, I am only worried about what I have in my mind for others, so I think Tasha also will not be offended by the comment. ( Seeing her responses to others in other places, though i am one day old to forum)

Humility is the best weapon in the whole world.  

we all are just putting forward our inputs ( May be incomplete and totally wrong also). But it will contribute to other individuals to think and explore to find out more about the topic ( if they are interested )  

Don't worry, I see she is the definition of " Strong Woman " . she started a topic, we went off some tangents, got some feed backs and that is an inevitable consequence of daring to start. Everything is good. I really never thought that something like this will be there in this site. After so many years, I sit and read so much stuff that too totally idling a full holiday, got some insight into how women in that part of the world see and think.

I request that any opinion posted here should not the taken as an attack. I come from the land of spices, I love to cook. I love to mix and match in the most unconventional ways. I don't think anyone is offended. Lets move on.  

yes. you are strong. so you are able to laugh at yourself. I have seen that it so difficult for most people.

Good read.  

How do we say that someone who is sacrificing - consciously doing something - is a victim. When does one become a victim ?

" .Да и на меня особо никто и не нападает. " Really a good way to take things. You really talk like i do. I love it when people say things. It cannot be taken as an attack. if we take it that way, we will pollute our own mind. It is also a way of thinking. I really appreciate what you wrote here. Good to know you, you are cool  .  

after reading through this forum, I had started to think in detail about what does a man mean when he says strong woman. My mother was not strong - Iron woman. I have inherited more things from her than my father. Now with the responses you made, I have more things in mind to write about.

Stay the way you are. This is not about flattery, just a feed back on what we see .

I think that we should not have pushed on lydmila so much, she might not open up next time. Every thing is a opportunity - to add to the spice mix to think more deeply.  

Was not needed to heat up  

Everyone is welcome to discuss. All voices matter. Your voice also helped in thinking. This is nothing conclusive or will affect our daily life. So no need to take this way.

i felt that every opinion ( provocation as you term it) which will increase the depth and that will stretch a discussion to expand the boundaries are ok. I didnt see anyone being very offended. After human interactions comes in various shapes and forms. I am a agitator myself in my feild of activities. But it bring more closer ties and better understanding and creates new meaningful conversations and food for thought for everone.

when we interact, we all will expose our propensities. But here everything was within the limited and nice interaction it was. I dont know about others - i think on a lot of topics, i was very shallow on this, i got a lot of things to learn and understand. Julie was definitely help in adding a lot of valid points.

Great response.