“I want”, “I want”, “I want” and – surprise, surprise “I want”!

Have you ever considered that a relationship primarily is a give and then a take (if at all)?

Have you also ever considered that by the time your desired children would go through the biggest hardships and troubled times of their lives, i.e. their teenage years, you’d be an aging grandfather who himself requires support, care and assistance?

You would be in no condition to lend them the necessary support, the reliable emotional or physical stability that they require to grow into independent and responsible adults. By the time they’d graduate from university, you’d have to be carted in in a wheelchair to attend the ceremony.

You say you “have good plans for [your] future? Yes, your future and yours only! Who would take care of your desired ever so “much younger woman” when she gets old? You would condemn her to sit alone with your children because you’d be deceased and there will be no-one left to take care of her.

Slow down cowboy! @Ben

There is nothing wrong with saying clearly what "I Want". After all, a lot of marriages fail because one or both of the partners fail to acknowledge what they want.

There are ways to provide for the family after your demise, being life insurance just an example.

There is no way to predict what would be my health at any specific point in life.

I also stated clearly what I am willing to give, so I tried to make it a balanced statement.  

Why so much hate @Ben?

Really. I am not offending you nor anybody else for that matter.

Who do you think you are to with such a plenipotentiary air of superiority state that I am neither suitable nor fit for a relationship?

Just because you disagree with me doesn't make it right for you to profer a personal attack.

Cowboy?
Slow down, gambler.
If you wanted to make it a balanced statement, you would be looking for someone within your own league and not for someone "much younger".
Do you seriously want to say that your state would be all intact 20 years from now?
And putting someone who still has more than half her life ahead of herself at the mercy of health insurance and condemning her to becoming a widow within the reach of her foreseeble future is egoistic beyond measure.

Ooops.. that's a classic  

Hi Hugo ,

Well , I saw that someone , already gave you a very tough and harsh reply.That is not my intention and I will not get into the age difference either.

After reading your post , I wonder , if you could not have written this all , in your profile.Every woman , who is checking your profile , will read this and then can make up her mind.

You mention , that you get a lot of letters but for the most part , you are not interested.So , say " Sorry , thank you and I wish you all the best " would be fine.

I get the idea , that you probably are looking for a " Wonder Woman" !!! ( Oh , I still have not watched that movie .... )
Maybe your bucket list , is not too realistic and is a bit too long ?

Furthermore I ask myself , if this is how you converse with women , in your daily life.I mean , you are not making it a monologue ??

In your post , I never read , that you want to listen to her seriously and then you both , may or may not get to a compromise.Well , you know that a relation is to make ...... exactly.

Bravo, Ben, When you don`t speak only about  your money, you  say  nice and wisely. Well pointed.

Hi Hugo! You are asking why you're still single; let me offer you my two cents.
You want to meet a girl who is 20-30 years junior to you; you want her beauty, her youth, her innocence, and her zest for life. You say that you can offer "dedication, attention, patience, protection, support, encouragement, challenge, loyalty, respect, love, etc." Sorry to disappoint you, but to me, it sounds more like a good father rather than a romantic partner. Most likely such a girl already has one dad. Why would she need another one?
A young girl who is active, open-minded, hungry to learn and explore, doesn't need someone to protect her from life experiences. She wants such experiences, she needs a partner to grow together.
Furthermore, in just ten years your sex drive will inevitably decline due to natural reasons, while she just reaches her prime. In 20 years, you might, god forbid, begin to face serious health issues. At that time, she will be at her career peak. Do you believe your young wife will be looking forward to becoming a caregiver for her aging husband?

I totally agree with you, Ben !

Hello Eric

It is difficult to convey the whole set of beliefs and attitudes I hold, in a simple post in this forum.

I, of course, am willing to listen to my partner and everyone else that comes into my life path. I believe is easy to judge someone and that is much harder to really understand. I strive then to understand.

Interestingly enough I didn't consider that I was asking for too much as I myself was a big dreamer when I was younger and didn't stop being one. I consider myself to be a huge optimist and an idealist but I also work towards my dreams so they will not just be a fantasy.

Thank you for your words

Hello Svetlana

I didn't think it was proper to specify aspects that are, in my opinion implied, such as the basics in a romantic relationship. If I were to specify every single thing that I can offer to my future life partner this would not be a post but a lengthy dissertation. I, of course, want to have many life experiences and I expect my future wife to share them with me and grow together.

I consider funny that people talk about sex drive as a given and set in stone, and the same goes for health. Every person is different and there can be no guarantees for health at any age. Nobody can say how long will a life be nor how healthy will be.

Thanks …
Show me the (or any post) when I speak "only about money" - I created two posts showing that marrying for money is a shameful disgrace and disgusting. That is and will remain my conviction to my last dying, and anyone who thinks marrying for money were OK is just as out of touch with reality as this Hugo here.

He considers himself "48 years young", and the tragedy is that he is apparently really serious about it. Any woman who'd give herself away to him would only use the liaison as a springboard to head off elsewhere with someone whom she can be truly together with. Personally, I consider relationships with an age gap of more than 13 years a great risk.
Making a generational, or even double generational leap is insane.
For a moment, I was hoping that the whole thing might be an attention seeking scam, but alas the guy is really means it…

sorry, but you are neither a bodybuilder with model looks, nor a multi-millionaire, nor a famous actor or singer. So it will be difficult to attract proper ladies. I guess you will find such woman from some small village or small russian city (not capital) which has difficulties in her life to survive or difficulties with her parents that wants to leave. Maybe you should look for an orphan. She will marry you, get her education, citizenship, then be ready for divorce. After that she will find someone better. This is life. If you want some care to be cared when you get older this won't be children or wife if this wife is much younger, some money should be put aside to be able to afford care from qualified personnel privately. There could be other variant of possible future as well. You will use her innocence, beauty and health without providing her enough material means to grow and become someone in the society, will keep her at home because of being afraid she will find someone else, keep her tied to you and when she will become not so young and beautiful or gains weight you will divorce her (usually such marriages last 6 years) and will go look for another 18 year old and she will have to go back to Russia to have miserable life with not so many possibilities at that time because you stole her youth, beauty, health and possibilities with this relationship from her.

Bravissimo,Ben!!!!!!

Just look at "Kim Dotcom" - he's as rich as sin and uses (especially Russian) women more quickly than they change their tampax.
Relationships based on money (whatever the looks) fail. Marrying for money is a disgrace.
Starting an outergenerational relationship is more than risky.
Marrying two generations down (eg 48 years OLD and 18 years YOUNG) is downright crazy.
This guy needs a reality check!
You have superbly outlined the dismal prospects and the certain doom of a relationship, such as Hugo fantasises about: bound to fail.
Let's hope, Hugo comes to his senses (otherwise he'll be good company for our "famous Canadian" 😀 

Если женщина полна жаждой жизни, то почему она выберет мужчину старше себя на 30 лет и начнет рожать детей? В 18 лет страстное желание стать матерью нескольких детей и отдать себя их воспитанию это называется , я думаю, не желанием наслаждаться жизнью, а желанием стать домашней курочкой-наседкой. Дети ограничат свободу передвижения и общения, активной адаптации на несколько лет.

потому что, Наташа, там же мешки/ правда, под глазами/!

Да, еще не всякая сирота согласиться жить с мужчиной намного лет старше себя. Если только какая-то совсем уж падшая и гулящая девушка без моральных принципов.

Hugo, я посмотрела Вашу анкету и, уж простите, даже для себя не нашла в ней ничего привлекательного. А Вы претендуете на внимание девушек возраста моей дочери. Мне очень интересно - на чем основана такая самоуверенность?

Оля, дорогая, как у вас дела?

Он думает, что каждой молодой и не молодой женщине за счастье приехать и жить с ним в его стране. Это главный козырь, но это стериотип мышления пролых лет, когда было тяжело жить в наших странах после всем известных потрясений. Сейчас все изменилось, женщины хотят просто любить и быть любимыми( я надеюсь что так).

Видимо есть у мужчины материальные возможности приобрести молодой инкубатор для вынашивания детей, и видимо есть уверенность, что он его найдет.

Та что-то там наоборот прослеживается отсутствие каких-либо личных успехов. Разве что наследство дедушки в закромах имеется или социальные пособия в Люксембурге достаточно щедры

Наташа так ведь другие то находили! Пусть не 18 летних, постарше, но с разницей 25, помню один хвалился. И этот найдет со временем. Многим деньги важнее жизни. Я как представлю возраст: моя дочь и мой мч, это ж уму непостижимо! Мне и то он кажется старым потрепанным, а в голове то ветер, самому нужна мамка, не привык же детей растить и отвественность как у щенка.

Наташа! При сегодняшнем отношении к гражданам Восточного блока замужество с иностранцем - это самый продуктивный способ закрепиться в европейской стране/ не знаю американскую тенденцию, да и африканскую тоже/. Поэтому, как правильно, женщины написали ранее:"Хоть чучелом, хоть тушкой!"И обязательно на стареющего европейца найдется молодая и амбициозная девушка/ но здесь уже столько писали про Альцгеймер, что повторяться не хочется!/

I think some time ago there was some post from the person looking like you in this forum or maybe it was you? asking about failed relationship with some russian woman which was much younger and which wanted only shopping and money and wondering why she wanted only money. I think there is much risc to end with a woman like that if you are looking for someone much younger. An honest younger woman looking for love wouldn't chose a grandfather as a husband.

Более - менее нормально.

Ну и отлично.

Without going into a lengthy argument, could you please explain what exactly, besides your rich inner world, you can offer to a much younger girl? What have you accomplished in life, professionally and personally?

It's stated in your profile, that you appreciate honesty. Well, I would like to be honest with you--the woman you describe is out of your league and would be impossible to find in your own country. That is the main reason why you are here, looking for an Eastern European girl 30 years junior. I think that if you try to approach a 18-y.o. in Luxemburg, or any other Western European country, you would risk to be ridiculed, or worse, she would call a police on you.
It amazes me how many foreign men still cannot get rid of illusion that Eastern Europe is full of young, beautiful nymphs who dream of a foreigner, any foreigner, to get married. That era is over, Hugo, and it's been for almost 20 years now.