Yavuz, 42 y.o.
ITS One Life ! So RISE & SHINE ON
There is no point in trying to outdo another person if in doing so, you are still ON PAR with what YOU have always done True GRATIFICATION and REWARD should not be attempted based on a bar that ANOTHER has set for themselves…it is a futile attempt at achievement, for really, you are not truly ADVANCING if you are not RAISING your OWN bar Hold yourself ACCOUNTABLE for your actions and make REAL progress by always improving a bit MORE than YOU did the day before...and repeat this each and EVERY day There is no need to focus on anyone else but Y-O-U...There is no MAXIMUM capacity that you can reach at which point your SELF-IMPROVEMENT efforts stop being EFFECTIVE...the formation of the very best you is your NEVER-ENDING goal and EVER-RISING limit
Happy Valentines day people
In honor of Valentine's Day....this is to all of my singles out there!
♥ There is yet to be a breakthrough drug developed to cure "SINGLEHOOD-ITIS"...you know why? Because there's NOTHING wrong with you! ♥ There truly is someone "out there" for everyone. If you have yet to be struck by Cupid's arrow, be patient...there is a Power much greater than you that is timing everything in the PERFECT order so that you will find that person..."right on time" ♥ Do not search desperately with rose-tinted glasses, for this often leads to settling...If you are going to settle, settle into your OWN skin...and find CONTENTMENT ♥ ENJOY YOU! I truly believe that if you fill YOURSELF with enough LOVE, you become much easier TO love. If you can't love yourself first, how can you expect someone else to? ♥ Remove yourself from any "clinical trials" and stop looking for a prescription...the only REMEDY you need is to RELAX...and ROMANCE YOURSELF ♥
ITS One Life ! So RISE & SHINE ON
Self-doubt is the biggest impediment to achieving one's SUCCESS. It either forces you to take smaller steps than the enormous strides that you have the ABILITY of taking or it prevents you from even getting started. The only thing that should ever stop, however, is this limiting mindset ♥ This is your WAKE-UP call...for the hibernation of your goals is over. The life that you have to this point only DREAMED about can now be your REALITY. It is time to ARISE to the AMAZING life that you are intended to live and ALL of the things that you were created in order to ACCOMPLISH ♥ Build up your BELIEF in yourself by taking baby steps toward your goals...your "CAN-DO" attitude will GROW exponentially with each one, as will the strides that you develop the CONFIDENCE to take ♥ You are capable of so much MORE than you may realize...REALIZE this in order to REALIZE YOUR POTENTIAL
ITS One Life ! So RISE & SHINE ON
At some point or another on the climb to your SUCCESS, you are likely to encounter someone who wants to loosen your footholds…KEEP CLIMBING ♥ Some will voice their opinion that they do not understand or believe in your goals, but you must stay focused and hold on tight to the MOUNTAIN of your DREAMS. CONTINUE YOUR ASCENT, for if every entrepreneur allowed a critic’s opinion to stop them in their tracks, we wouldn’t have any of the tremendous advances that we have in all fields of life ♥ Do not allow those that do not enjoy seeing you succeed to drag you down your cliff, for there are many more who can’t wait to APPLAUD you at the SUMMIT ♥ Hold on to the ropes of DETERMINATION and OUT CLIMB any juggernaut…Remember, no matter who tries to pull you off of the mountain, you are HARNESSED by your FAITH ♥ Keep your eyes focused on the APEX, for you are mere steps away from the view from the TOP ♥
ITS One Life ! So RISE & SHINE ON
You do average - they'll still have...
You do bad - they still will have...
Doesn't Matter whatever you will do - Relatives, People and almost everyone around WILL JUDGE YOU and make an opinion about u.
So ! Why worry ? they will never let you live ...
Keep doing that 'which suits u & takes u into that kind of Life which suits u'.
ITS One Life ! So RISE & SHINE ON
Here are 20 extremely funny motivational quotes that are sure to make you go ROFL and maybe inspire you at the same time.
Being funny is a damn Serious Business 🙂
“Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, they will start using it.”
“Motivational Speakers & Motivational Books are like Viagra. The effect doesn’t last long. People do not do what they know. They do what their momentum (deep ingrained habits) make them do.”
“Monday definitely is a Man. It comes too quickly.”
– Some Unknown Woman
“I find television very educational. Every time someone turns it on, I go in the other room and read a book.”
– Groucho Marx
“Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing ’til it gets there.”
– Josh Billings
“Learn the rules like a pro, so you can break them like an artist.“
– Pablo Picasso
“Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in one ahead”
– Bill McGlashan
“Life is like a taxi, the meter just keeps ticking whether you are getting somewhere or standing still. So, move your ass & do something big; lest life treats you like an ass.”
“There are three kinds of people in the world. People who make things happen. People who watch things happen and people who say “What happened?”
“Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.”
– Dennis Wholey
“When a man is wrapped up in himself he makes a pretty small package.”
– John Ruskin
“Never miss a good chance to shut up.”
“We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.”
“Smokers: Young enough to think they can. Old enough to think they shouldn’t. Stupid enough to do it anyway.”
“When you eat less, you look good in clothes. When you exercise, you look good without them.”
“Don’t accumulate fat and karma. Both are difficult to burn!”
“If we were to divert even 50% of our Social Media time to Bhagwaan Krishna; he will personally come and send us a friend request.”
“Going to temple/church/mosque doesn’t make you a human, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.”
“Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self esteem, first make sure you are not, in fact, just surrounded by a**holes.”
Hope some of this collection of extremely funny motivational quotes not only made you think but also put a small smile on your face. Job Done!
I believe God is a comedian, laughing at the seriousness of human race all the time 🙂 … Laugh a little more, mostly on yourself so that no one takes offence. And do spread more smiles along the way while you can!
5 Ways Of Ensuring You Stick To Your To Do List
The majority of people (99%) have this great ability to avoid doing what actually needs to be done. They end up sticking to their To Do lists only when what they truly value gets threatened. The very small 1% people who have realized the profound benefits of sticking to their set out To Do List go on to become Top Achievers.
So, here are 5 ways that have worked for me:
1. Wake Up Early:
Steve Jobs to Richard Branson to Narender Modi to Roger Fed- all have spoken about their career changing secret ‘Utilize the time between 5 am and 8am’. Trust me, waking up early is a key to getting things done.
I don’t know what it is with the morning air. It just makes people feel like working. And since 80% people are sleeping in those wee hours of the day – there is a lot less environmental disturbance.
Sun shining, birds chirping, a very calm environment that helps you focus. This time is not only meditative to your mind but also therapeutic for the wears & tears that you face daily. I firm my agenda for the day in this time.
Just you and your list and your complete attention to life! If you remove the unnecessary distractions (I call it attractive garbage), you will notice that to-dos are, at the end of the day, just to-dos.
Also, waking up early will give you a false, but very realistic and useful sense of having more than 24hours in a day. Who wouldn’t want that!!
2. 2 Minute Noodles
Confused? Let me explain.
Most of the stuff on your list will be minuscule stuff. That’s what I have noticed. It appears XXL to mind but in reality when you do it it comes to be petite (XXS) in size. When I start, it feels like I have a mountain to climb every day. But if you look closely, almost 60-70% of has the ability to get done very quickly, provided we do so.
If it takes just 2 minutes to do a thing, do it first. Suck it up & just do it. The first off the list will feel like a burden. The second will feel a little better. And by the time you reach the third, not only will your speed increase but your procrastination will reduce in an inversely proportional manner. Tried and tested!
3. The Sequence Conundrum:
Most people do this mistake of scheduling the most important tasks all together. I have a different approach.
I schedule my work in pockets – spread across the day. Depending on how many huge tasks I have, I try to mix and match. I would begin with a few small but important ones just to set the ball rolling. Having ticked off 4 small but important tasks will make you feel good and set the inertia. Then get one or two bigger ones ticked off.
Then take a break. Yes. It is crucial that you rest your brain a little after you have completed say 25% of your list. But, don’t let that break stretch for the remaining half of the day.
I try to sit in 3-4 phases in a day. And I schedule different kind of tasks together. That also keeps a check on monotony. I will read the two journal articles I was supposed to and then maybe throw in the writing of my blog post along with it.
This has another advantage. You can make your work multi-disciplinary too.
4. Removing The Distractions & Becoming A Modern Monk:
I will tell you upfront. It is not easy.
You will need to be very tough. Because I am going to ask you to put your phone away and will yourself to not open Facebook for 2 hours. Can you do that for yourself? Most would not have the guts to become a modern monk.
The technologically advanced generation has 2 lethal byproducts – smarter phones and dumber people. We know our phones and Whatsapp messages distract us. But we still sit with them. Is that ‘ping’ and then a very trivial futile, probably not so funny message from a would be crush more important than taking one more step towards your goals?
If your answer is yes, then you probably should not even have been reading this article in the first place!
I will simplify it for you. If you don’t want to switch it off, just put in on silent with vibration switched off as well. Keep it face down and get on with your work. You will be amazed as to how quickly you forget about your phone and other gadgets.
Working on only one device at a time really helps.
5. Removing Clutter:
Till the time I used to have a cluttered desk and work-space, my distractions and hence the probability of an incomplete to-do list at the end of the day used to be really high.
Now I make sure that my desk only has stuff that I need for my work-space. I am not asking you to keep it clean. That is completely your prerogative. But don’t make it chaotic. Chaos may be a sign of creativity at times but it can never induce productivity for sure.
If you keep things that you don’t need around you, you will also keep doing things that don’t need to be done. To-dos have to be approached like a horse with its binders on. If you only see your list – you will stick to it.
I read this interesting article which said, it is a myth that humans can multi-task. The brain does not have the ability to process more than one task together. The attention will always be more for the task you are currently doing. If you are walking and talking, you are pretty much only thinking about the talking part. The brain focuses on the one that takes more cognitive effort.
Pin ItThe key to ensuring that you stick to your to-dos is to remove as many distractions as possible. And that means you need to stop telling yourself that you can multi-task and start telling yourself that you can indeed be quick, efficient and highly focused.
Speed and accuracy are more important indicators of high productivity rather than our false belief of our ability to multi-task.
If you want to tick those boxed against those tasks, forget everything else and just do it!
The ship called 'Relationship' begins to shake
The ship called 'Relationship' begins to shake
-when you slow your own efforts at becoming awesome in your own personal life.
-when you just keep on thinking about the relationship only
-when you stop doing mad, alive & interesting things in your own life for your own self
-when doing all the above slowly, gradually renders you less attractive to your partner & he / she starts looking here & there at others.
Then, when you realize that relationship is not working out magically; you have already lost the magical time.
Stay Awesome YOURSELF for your partner to find you awesome & keeping the MAGIC alive !!
Otherwise - Titanic smile emoticon
The finest poem that I read in my Life :) about men
Man O Man!
When without money,
eats vegetables at home;
When has money,
eats the same vegetables in a fine restaurant.
When without money, rides bicycle;
When has money rides the same ‘exercise machine’.
When without money walks to earn food
When has money, walks to burn fat;
Man O Man! Never fails to deceive themselves!
When without money,
wishes to get married;
When has money,
wishes to get divorced.
When without money,
wife becomes secretary;
When has money,
secretary becomes wife.
When without money, acts like a rich man;
When has money acts like a poor man.
Man O Man! Never can tell the simple truth!
Says share market is bad,
but keeps speculating;
Says money is evil,
but keeps accumulating.
Says high Positions are lonely,
but keeps wanting them.
Says gambling & drinking is bad,
but keeps indulging;
Man O Man! Never means what he says and never says what he means..
When without near ones, wishes to have some.......
When has some, cares for none.......
Wonderful Message to All of you
Birth.: Given by others
Name: Given by others
Education: Given by others
Income / Revenue: Given by others
Respect: Given by others
First & Last Bath: will be Given by others
After Death Your Property & Belongings: will be taken by others
Funeral service / Burials: Will be done by others...
Still I wonder why We have the unnecessary ego problems.
WE HAVE ONE LIFE & TEMPORARY LIFE SO LOVE AND LIVE WITH OTHERS PEACEFULLY.
"The only reason we don’t have what we want in life is the reasons we create why we can’t have them." ♥ It is so important to not impose restrictions on what you can achieve or possess in life, for the reality is that you can BE, DO or HAVE ANYTHING that you CHOOSE ~ If you doubt that, your first step is to choose to BELIEVE that you CAN ♥ If you have already placed a barricade on the road in front of you with doubt, regain power with the knowledge that you can remove it and start to PROGRESS FORWARD towards WHATEVER it is that you HOPE and DREAM for ♥ Remove any limiting beliefs that you have, for YOUR life is LIMITLESS... ♥
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL OF YOU.
"Joy is the true gift of Christmas, not the expensive gifts that call for time and money. We can communicate this joy simply: with a smile, a kind gesture, a little help, forgiveness. And the joy we give will certainly come back to us..Let us pray that this presence of the liberating joy of God shines forth in our lives." ♥ No gift under the tree will bring you true happiness if you do not first have happiness in your heart ♥ Bring to mind all of the many BLESSINGS and JOYS that you have in your life and use this feeling to ignite the spark of CHEER in all that you encounter today~The GOOD WILL that you spread to others will be your greatest GIFT to yourself, for it truly is in GIVING that we RECEIVE ♥Extending so many wishes of JOY, PEACE, HOPE and GRATITUDE to you all...God Bless.. MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL OF YOU.
List Of Fantastic Books For Your Reading Habit
Your chances of doing ‘FANTASTIC’ in this modern world increase multi-fold; if you adopt the ‘3R’ approach. ‘3R’ is — ‘Running, Reading and Relaxing’. As a Motivational Speaker , one tip I have consistently given to my audiences, especially young people and their parents is – 3 most crucial habits for a wholesome life are – 1) habit of being physically and mentally fit, 2) a great reading habit and 3) a love for travel. Trust me, it takes care of a lot of things. And that’s why, I have put together this list of fantastic books for you. Because, whether you accept it or not – reading is a great, quite healthy habit!
Let me start with the last ‘R’ i.e. Relaxing. If your mind is not relaxed; I mean, if it is always involved in trivial issues- you will never get a good productivity, out of your day. So, learn to rise above superficial issues in life — as people issues, small stuff etc. (Here are 10 Simple Ways to Relax Your Mind)
‘Running’ — leads to an energy reservoir within you. Moreover, the old saying — ‘A healthy body leads to a healthy mind’. You need energy for everything in your life. All successful people are / have been energetic. Can you recall the name of even a single successful person who was lazy and less energetic? No..naa !! So, Run and run hard. At least , for half an hour in a day — 7 days a week.
‘Reading’, builds 1) smartness and 2) perspectives in life. Try doing it — you’ll understand, what I wrote. It is a habit. We are nothing, but creatures of our own habits. The better habits we have, the better we become. Reading will give you that notorious confidence to 1) understand and 2) live life better. Our problem is not that we are ‘poor’ readers; it is that we are ‘inefficient readers’. Smart Reading doesn’t take much time to do. If you are still not convinced, here are some 100+ answers on the question ‘Why Reading is Important?’. And if you are worried that you have will power issues when it comes to sticking with a book till the end, here’s something that might help you: 5 Ways You can Develop Unlimited Will Power
I am putting up a list of fantastic books below. They are categorized into genres so that you can straight away go through what you enjoy most. All are eclectically chosen, keeping ‘you’ in mind. Almost all the recommendations have been made out of my personal reading experience or from the experiences of some of my very close friends who themselves are very good readers.
The intent is bi-fold:
1) Exposing your mind to a variegated genre of reading
2) Get you addicted into reading as a habit; which in the long run will make you a better human being.
You’ll not only enjoy reading them; but also be able to build your mental muscles.
“Be a disparate reader. Be a ravenous reader. More importantly — BE A READER.”
Recommended reading by Akash Gautam
FICTION / LITERATURE /ABSTRUSE READING
Level 1 —
Harry Potter series by J. K. Rowling
Any book by Agatha Christie
Any book by Sidney Sheldon
Animal Farm – George Orwell (A Must Must Read)
A Man Called Ove – Fredrick Backman (A highly recommended book by most ardent bibliophiles)
Any book by Amish Tripathi
Any book by Jeffery Archer
Any book by John Grisham (King of the torts, The Rainmaker etc.) (Legal Fiction)
Any book by Arthur Hailey (Airport, Hotel) (Service Sector Fiction)
The White Tiger ( Arvind Adiga)
The Godfather (Mario Puzo)
1984 (George Orwell)
Foundation (Isac Asimov) (Astronomy Fiction)
Any book by Robert Ludlum
Any book by Robin Cook (Medical Fiction)
40 Rules of Love (and other works of Eli Shafak)
Level 3 –
Any book by Amitav Ghosh (The Hungry Tide, The Calcutta Chromosome, The sea of poppies)
Any book by Jhumpa Lahiri (The namesake, Interpreter of Maladies)
Any book by Khaled Hosseini
Any book by Frederick Forsyth ( the Icon, The Afghan etc.)
The God of small things (Arundhati Roy)
‘The Great Expectations’ or ‘ A tale of two cities’— Charles Dickens.
Stories by O.Henry.
‘A book of English Essays’ — (Penguin classics).
‘Black Beauty’ — Anna Sewell.
The Book Thief – Markus Zusak
Bride and Prejudice – Jane Austen
Level 4 –
Any book by Haruki Murakami (Kafka on the Shore, Norwegian Wood, Men Without Women)
Any book by Kazuo Ishiguro (Nobel prize for literature, 2017) (The Remains of the Day, Nocturnes)
Any book by Salman Rushdie (Midnight Children, The Enchantress of Florence, Shalimar the clown)
Any book by Orhan Pamuk (Snow, my name is red, Museum of Innocence etc.)
Any book by Franz Kafka (The trial, Metamorphosis etc.)
‘The secret pilgrim’ – Joseph Heller.
‘Beloved’ — Toni Morrison .
‘By the sea’ — Abdulrazak Gurnah.
‘The eighth commandment’- Lawrence Sanders.
‘The romantic Manifesto’ or ‘The virtue of selfishness’ or ‘Capitalism The Unknown ideal’ or ‘The Fountainhead’ or ‘Atlas Shrugged’ by Ayn Rand.
‘The dialogues of Plato’- (Batnam books) .
‘The Third Wave’ or ‘Future Shock’ or ‘Powershift’ – Alvin Toffler.
All books by Paulo Coelho; especially ‘The Alchemist’.
All books by Gabriel Garcia Marquez (Love in the Times of Cholera, One Hundred Years of Solitude etc.)
BUSINESS / MANAGEMENT BOOKS
Who says Elephants can’t Dance Louis Gerstner
Who moved my Cheese : Dr. Spencer Johnson
Make sure you read every week — the case studies of Business World.
The seven habits of highly effective people : Stephen R Covey
How to win friends & influence people : Dale Carnegie
Winning : Jack Welch
The Art of War by Sun Tzu
Six Thinking Hats by Edward de Bono
Built to Last : Jim Collins
Influence: The psychology of persuasion by Robert Cialdini
The Wal-Mart effect : Charles Fishman
Losing my Virginity : Richard Branson
The Culting of Brands: Douglas Atkin
Emotional Design ; Donald A Norman
The 22 Immutable Laws of Marketing : Al Ries, Jack Trout
‘I am right , You are Wrong’- Edward de Bono.
‘The GOAL’ — Eliyahu and Goldratt Cox ( A must read).
‘The 80/20 Principle’ — Richard Koch.
‘Small is beautiful’- EF Schumacher
‘Maverick’- Ricardo semler.
‘Pepsi to apple’- John Sculley.
‘Hit and Run’- Nancy Griffin and Kim Masters.
‘Emotional Intelligence’- Daniel Goleman.
BOOKS ON FINANCE & INVESTING
Berkshire Hathaway letters to Shareholders – Warren Buffett (& Essays by Warren Buffett)
Rich Dad Poor Dad and all other works of Robert Kiyosaki
The Intelligent Investor – Benjamin Graham
Think and Grow Rich – Napoleon Hill
A Random Walk Down Wall Street – Burton G. Malkiel
Poor Charlie’s Almanack – Charlie Munger
Fooled by Randomness – Nassim Taleb
The Dhandho Investor – Mohnish Pabrai
BOOKS ON LEADERSHIP
The Starfish & the Spider – Brafman & Breckstrom
Built to Last – Jim Collins
Leading Change – John Kotter
The Leadership Dojo – Richard Srozzi
The Tipping Point – Malcolm Gladwell
Outsmart – Jim Champy
Love is the killer App – Tim Sanders
The One minute Manager – Kenneth Blanchard
True North – Bill George
First, Break all the Rules – Buckingham & Coffman
The Compassionate Samurai – Brian Klemmer
‘A Better India, a Better World’ – Narayan Murthy
The greatness of Saturn — Robert.E.Svoboda
Chariots of God — Erich Von Daniken
The prophecies of Nostradmus — Erika Cheetham.
SCIENCE AND BIOLOGY
‘Genius’- James Gleick
‘E=mc2 ’- David Thomson
‘Genetic engineering’ — Mae —wan ho
‘Germs — the ultimate weapon’- Judith miller.
‘Men — from stone age to clone age’- John Madeley.
1) ‘The human zoo’ and 2) ‘The naked ape’ — Desmond Morris.
1) ‘The tao of physics’ and 2) ‘The turning point’ or 3) ‘The web of life’ — Fritz o’ Capra.
‘A Brief History of Time’ – Stephen Hawking.
Homo Sapiens A Brief History of Manking & Homo Deus: A Brief History of Tomorrow – Yuval Noah Harrari
Sophie’s World – Jostein Gaarder ( A must read History + Philosophy book)
‘Taliban’- Ahmed Rashid .
‘Long walk to Freedom’- Nelson Mandela.
‘The autobiography of an unknown Indian’- Nirad C. Chaudhary.
‘Discovery of India’ — Nehru(chacha).
‘Europe since Napoleon’- David Thomson.
‘Burma — The curse of independence’- Shelby Tucker .
‘Memories of Madness Stories of 1947’ — Penguin publishers.
‘India’s struggle for independence’- Bipan Chandra.
Books by William Dalrymple
Thinking Fast and Slow – Daniel Kahneman
Freakonomics – Levitt & Dubner
‘The black economy in India’- Arun Kumar .
‘The price of onions’ — Ashok V. Desai.
‘Hungry for trade’ — John Madeley.(Penguin).
‘The Elephant The Tiger and The Cellphone’ – Shashi Tharoor
Bhagwat Geeta – Any Commentary (S. Radhakrishnan, Vinoba Bhave)
Wings of Fire – Dr. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k – Mark Manson
The Power of Intention – Dr.Wayne Dyer
My decision to Live – Nader Elguindi
Stop Whining, Start Living – Dr. Laura Schlessinger
The Last Lecture – Randy Pausch
The Power of Positive Thinking – Dr. Norman Vincent Peale
The Monk who sold his Ferrari , Lead without a Title – Robin Sharma
Awaken the Giant within – Athony Robbins
The Power of Now – Eckhart Tolle
The Power of Habit – Charles Duhigg
See You at the top – Zig Ziglar
Who Moved my Cheese – Spencer Johnson
One Minute Manager – Ken Blanchard and Spencer Johnson
Any book by Robin Sharma
Autobiography of a Yogi — Parmahansa Yogananda Ji (the book that changed my life) (Buy Here)
Other works of Paramhansa Yogananda Ji (God Talks with Arjuna, The Divine Romance)
Adiyogi The Source of Yoga, Inner Engineering by Sadhguru Jaggi Vasudev (Highly recommended)
Siddhartha by Herman Hesse
All books by Swami Vivekananda
Peace is Every Step by Thich Naht Hanh
Yoga Sutras of Patanjali
Any book by Deepak Chopra
The Journey Home by Radhanath Swami
The Spiritual Teachings of Ramana Maharshi
A Gradual Awakening by Stephen Levine
Many Lives Many Masters – Brian Wess
BIOGRAPHY / AUTOBIOGRAPHY
Autobiography of a Yogi — Parmahansa Yogananda Ji (the book that changed my life)
Open – Andre Agassi
Steve Jobs – Walter Isaacson
‘Hitler’ — Ian Kershaw.
‘Iacocca’ — Lee Iacoca.
‘Business legends’ — Gita Piramal.
‘The diary of a young girl’ — Anne Frank
‘The Flight of Ambition’ – Apoorve Dubey
‘Every Second Counts’ – Lance Armstrong
‘A Beautiful Mind’ – Sylvia Nasar (based on life of John Nash)
PHILOSOPHY AND/ OR PSYCHOLOGY AND/OR SOCIOLOGY
‘An unquiet mind’ — Kay Redfield.
‘Creativity’- Mihaly Csikszentmihaly.
‘Them’- Jon Ronson.
‘Emotional Alchemy’- Tara Bennet.
Being Mortal – Atul Gawande
‘Zen and the art of Motorcycle maintenance’.
Doctors – Eric Sehgal
The conquest of happiness – Bertrand Russell
Unlimited power – Tony Robbins
The fifth Discipline – Peter Senge
It’s time when you stop making excuses. In the world of extremes that exist on social media, or your addiction with cat GIFs or stupid memes, a book can be a breath of fresh air. This list of fantastic books would be of no good if you keep allowing yourself to be tempted by distractions like sitcoms and television series’. Today, pick up that book and smell the beautiful smell it has. There is so much awesomeness remaining to be discovered in the thoughts of hundreds of authors who had the courage to share their stories. If a paperback is too much for you, pick up a kindle; even more convenient. But please do read!
Advice given to a young boy in his 20's:-
'Till the time you are depending upon people ONLY for your career' - you most likely will end up feeling like a football in the end.
Sharpen YOUR unique skills. Massively invest in converting your interest INTO a really sharp skill. No one will pay u for your interest & average skill set. People pay ONLY for brilliance.
Only 'contacts ' = 5/10
Only 'SKILL' = 5/10
Contacts + Skill = 10/10
Do you know what's the BEST way to MOVE ON?
1. Take the power in your own hands
2. Share the blame, where you can
What do I mean?
Don't think about how you have been wronged! Or what the other person did to you. That's not in your control - neither the input, nor the outcome.
And it will make you go craaaazzzyyyy !! Why did he / she do this to me???? While it's an important question, it won't take you ANYWHERE!!!
Better way -
Think about what you can control. What you can FIX. And that is -
Your part of the mistake.
Figure out where you went wrong, what you can do better in your life in such a situation. And then go ahead and DO IT. JUST FIX YOUR OWN DAMN MISTAKES!!
Try this out. Moving on, forgiving etc. All seem more doable when your workload is less. And it's not your 'Responsibility' to take responsibility for someone else's actions. They will come around in their own time !!
You put in the hard work. You reap the benefits!
Just 45 minutes and 36 questions are all you need to know your partner!
Is it possible to know intimate details, if not everything, about a person in just 45 minutes? While many would shake their heads in disagreement, psychologist Arthur Aron has made the impossible possible! Yes, the expert on interpersonal relationships has guaranteed that all you need are 36 questions and 45 minutes to break down emotional barriers with any person, be it random strangers or your partner. Armed with these questions you can now build new relationships, romantic or otherwise, just under an hour.
But don't forget to pause and ponder before sharing personal details! Curious? Read Vinita Nangia's blog 'Share intimacies, but don't overshare!' to understand how to be vulnerable and intimate, yet stay safe!
And, here are Arthur Aron's 36-questions. Don't forget to give these a try:
1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?
4. What would constitute a "perfect" day for you?
5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?
7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?
13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
14. Is there something that you've dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven't you done it?
15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
16. What do you value most in a friendship?
17. What is your most treasured memory?
18. What is your most terrible memory?
19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
20. What does friendship mean to you?
21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?
22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people's?
24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
25. Make three true "we" statements each. For instance, "We are both in this room feeling ... "
26. Complete this sentence: "I wish I had someone with whom I could share ... "
27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you've just met.
29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
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30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven't you told them yet?
34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner's advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.
Dear future husband, please don’t judge me for these 7 things This is what every girl wants her future husband to know...
1. Please don’t judge me for my choices...
Did you ever wonder why some people find the perfect husband and a few others end up with the wrong person? Being a modern girl, I have a certain set of expectations from my would-be husband that will eventually help us strengthen our relationship in long term. Because, everyone wants to find their ‘happily ever after’, right? So, dear future husband, before judging me for the choice I make in life, here is what you need to read…
2. My past relationships
I have had my own share of relationships but I don’t regret having them. Thanks to my past experiences, I now have a clear perspective of what I want in a relationship, and the qualities I seek in a partner. That experience will actually help me to make the right choice and choose you as my life partner. Plus, I am curious to know about yours!
If a few drops of blood decide my character, you better stay away from me.
4. My me-time
I love my ‘me-time’. I seek to left alone for a few hours, it does not mean I don’t love you anymore or have bored of our relationship. I might use this time to write a journal, concentrate on my hobbies, meditate or simply sit idle. I am just trying to reconnect with myself, that’s it!
I understand that I have certain responsibilities towards your family after getting married, but please don’t forget I have, and will always have my own family as well. Don’t take me as an irresponsible wife if I want to spend some time with my parents, or help them whenever required. And if I am accepting your parents as my new family, you need to do the same as well.
Dear future husband, you are going to marry a modern independent woman. She is professionally successful, financially independent, loves to travel (sometimes solo), and can even fix a punctured tyre all by herself. Rather than feeling little ‘less manly’ about my independence, take pride in marrying a girl who will not bother you to help her for every little thing. In fact, she might help you when you need her to.
7. My income
I am willing to contribute towards our new home and ease your financial burden. But please don’t mind if I spend some part of my earnings on my family and friends (including make-up as well!). I am not a spendthrift but don’t assume my salary is meant just for you and your family.
8. Let’s talk about household chores
I really hope you won’t mind doing the dishes if I turn up late from office, or cook breakfast for us the day I am unwell. We both have been brought up the same way, and I hope you understand the concept of equal work and equal opportunities.
So, do we have a deal?
Bas, 53 y.o.
I like to invite an Ukrainian woman to my country, The Netherlands. She agrees to come.
Till now I only had contact with her using this website and Whatsapp.
She has no computer with a webcam. So I only received some photos.
She now says an International passport costs 4700 hryvnia (174 USD). This seems a lot of money to me. Can someone tell me?
I want to pay it for her but I am still not sure about her being sincere.
Thanks for your advice.
This is the ideal age to get married, according to science!
t's already a confusing task to find the right partner to marry, and now, it seems there is also a right age bracket to get hitched, according to science.
According to a study carried out by Nicholas H. Wolfinger, a professor at the University of Utah suggests that the people who tie the knot between the ages of 28 to 32 have the least chances of getting divorced.
According to the research, the odds of divorce decline as you age from your teenage years through your late twenties and early thirties. The chances of divorce go up again as you move into your late thirties and early forties. Wolfiger writes, "Past the age of 32 or so, the odds of divorce increase by 5 percent per year of age at marriage. The kinds of people who wait till their thirties to get married may be the kinds of people who aren't predisposed toward doing well in their marriages."
The study that has been published by the Institute of Family Studies also suggests couples in their thirties are more mature and usually have a sounder economic foundation.
Wolfinger adds, "People who marry later face a pool of potential spouses that has been winnowed down to exclude the individuals most predisposed to succeed at matrimony."
Singing In The Lifeboat: Ayesha Chaudhary’s Inspirational Talk
Life is a shipwreck. But we must not forget to sing in the life boats – Voltaire
Inspiration comes in all sizes, colors, from all geographies and ages and myriad corners of the world – and has the power to knock you off your feet with breathtakingly beautiful force. As a Motivational Speaker for the youth, I have looked for stories far and wide, to move my audiences. And none of them are as this little powerhouse of inspiration – Ayesha Chaudhary.
Let me tell you her story:
Ayesha Chaudhary passed away in January, 2015 after a long battle with Pulmonary Fibrosis. She was just 17 and had battled the disease since birth. But not only did she make it to sweet 17 (doctors said she won’t make past 1!), she also found love and joy, wrote poems and poetry and has even published a book! (link at the end of the article) Her disease was like a birth mark she never could shrug off her. But she hid it exceptionally well under the garb of her optimism and never complain attitude! The odds doctors gave her were highly stacked against her! But odds are what? Statistics. Mostly they don’t lie. But if you have the courage to be an outlier, and then have the courage to live that life – what are odds to you really!
In her sweet, short 8 minute inspirational talk – she gives the odds of her being alive, talks about miracles and discusses her mantra of life. Watch the inspirational talk here:
Here are 5 inspiring lessons you can take back from her talk:
1. Believe in miracles:
Medical science and statistics prove that it is a miracle that she still breathes and walks. And she believes that miracles are good things that are unlikely to happen. So true!
1st miracle – She was born with Immune Deficiency. Only one in a million are born with this rarity which reduces their life expectancy to 1 year.
2nd miracle – she had to undergo a bone marrow transplant at the most tender age of 6 months. And it is a miracle that she survived. Only 30% people survive the surgery but she did!
3rd miracle – There was only 10% chance that she would develop Pulmonary Fibrosis (hardening of lungs) as a side effect of the surgery and yet again she did!
Rely on the miracle of life!
2. Live in the moment:
It is amazing how a small child talks about such a profound lesson of life with such ease, that too with the example of her good times with her puppy (she calls him Rolo). When we see life from a distance, we misinterpret it as a cumbersome and difficult journey to undertake. But when we take it hour by hour, moment by moment, it all seems much easier isn’t it? Don’t we keep saying ‘time just flew away’? That is what happens when you learn to live in the moment like her!
She forgot all the pain of her syringes, her illness and sadness when she played with her pets and cuddled into them. She concentrated on ‘what she could still do’ and not on ‘what she could no longer do’ and hence went ahead and got a photoshoot on a wheelchair since she couldn’t go to school! It is very easy to sit and cry over things we can’t do. But it takes courage to stand up and decide that we choose happiness over everything else in this world and do the things we still can. And she did just that.
3. Opportunities in Difficulties:
Chances never elude us if we are smart and quick enough to recognize and catch hold of them. Being confined to a wheelchair, she couldn’t do much. But that gave her loads of time to pursue her passions.
And it is true that when God takes away something, He gives something else in such an immense quality and quantity that you could live your whole life on that one gift. Aisha is a brilliant painter and spends a lot of her time painting. Infact, she even claims that she has painted more in her illness than in her wellness. If she can do it, why can’t we?
4. Never forget to dream:
Dreams are something that should be chased incessantly because they do come true. And there is nothing wrong in dreaming huge. It doesn’t cost a dime!
Lying motionless in her bed, Aisha used to dream of walking to the market with friends, dancing at her cousin’s wedding, visualized her costume for that dance, running around with her dogs and much more. And she willed herself into all that.
Mind is not a very difficult thing to beat. All you need is that extra bit of effort. The power of the mind is limitless. All things happen twice. Once in your mind and once in reality.
5. Pets are the best medicine:
Only the one, who has ever experienced the magic in the love a pet could give, can understand the sentiments behind her statement. It is not a kind of love you would ever see in human beings and it gives you immense power to fight the pain. More than what you could imagine. That’s why she says, ‘Buy a dog when nothing else works’
It is really outstanding, the way Aisha has turned around her life and decided to think only about the good things and the positives. There will always be too much negativity to pull us down. And there will always be something to sing about, something to be grateful for. The pick is ours!
She believes that her life is in the middle of a shipwreck and now is the best time to sing in the life boats. And she is doing just that. The challenges that life has thrown at her have helped her live a more enriched and intense life than may be what we have lived so far. Happiness is not a gift we take, but a choice we make. She ends her awe-inspiringly awesome talk with an even beautiful quote,
“My soul would have no rainbow, if my eyes had no tears”
She passed away shortly after that. You can see how she is all grown up. But in reality, she was very sick at the time and couldn’t breathe without a tube. But she wanted to look good in the pictures so she spoke without the tube anyway. She actually wanted to stand and talk, but her body couldn’t permit that strain! Let me tell you – there was not a single dry eye in the audience when she was done. In an auditorium filled with stalwarts, she got a resounding applause and a standing ovation.
She taught them the vanity of complaining and life and the power of acceptance that day. So if you are right now complaining about something, I hope this puts your life in perspective a little! More power to your soul Ayesha. You are a true rockstar, wherever you are!
Motivation You DECIDE to execute a plan for yourself.
You DECIDE to execute a plan for yourself.
You do it for a 1 or 2 days but then. ..Phusssss !!
Your old habits and almost the entire world claims you and prevents you from DOING the right ( & you end up doing the Easy ). You give up.
After a few days you make a commitment again to urself and the same vicious cycle repeats.
The only 3 things which can undo this are 1) Your crystal clear clarity about the benefits which will accrue to you should you meet the self discipline by saying NO to the exciting traps . Usually vague clarity leads to diffusion. Extreme clarity has a higher chance of seeing you through .
2) Your decision to say a NO to smaller pleasures of life .
Say a NO for the bigger pleasure I. E. The joy of seeing your decisions being implemented.
Smaller pleasures could be gossip , TV mobile phone (WhatsApp, FB bakar ), friends (who will prod u to hang out with them) & etc etc
3) Your dogged decision making to see your decisions through for the first ONE WEEK.
Normally when u do it for 7 days , something within u changes and slightly mutates your weak mind permanently for better. Then even if u miss your routines for a day or two ; the TASTE of success will trail you through to exert again.
7 days will become 15 and then 30. Soon it might juts become an overriding habit.
Then you ROAR .
Rise & Shine !
Keep working till you convert the lambs of your mind into lions.
Every relationship will get ‘boring” after you’ve been
together for years. Love isn‘t a feeling. ifs a
commitment; to love every day, physically and
emotionally. It’s difficult, it’s not always laughs. smiles
and fun. People tend to quit when it stops being fun,
and they go look for someone else, “Oh the spark is
gone.‘ No, that’s not how it works. You want
somebody to never give up on you, and love you
unconditionallf? Do the same. Be the change. This
isn‘t Hollywood, this isn‘t the movies. That shit isn’t
real. Love someone when you don’t want to.
when they aren't the easiest to deal with.
when they are hard to love.That’s the realist shit there is.
(Tag the important and the not so important men in your life. This is worth reading)
One day one father is having a conversation with his son.
The one that happens after I catch his eye doing what male eyes do well – following an object of lust. We will probably be out at the mall, because that’s what dads do with their sons, and I’ll catch the look. Maybe we’ll go to the beach and see it. Doesn’t matter where it is, there will come a time when I will see it. And then it will be time for this conversation.
Hey, come here. Let me talk to you. I saw you look at her. I’m not judging you or shaming you. I know why you did. I get it. But we have to talk about it because how you look at a woman matters.
A lot of people will try and tell you that a woman should watch how she dresses so she doesn’t tempt you to look at her wrongly. Here is what I will tell you. It is a woman’s responsibility to dress herself in the morning. It is your responsibility to look at her like a human being regardless of what she is wearing. You will feel the temptation to blame her for your wandering eyes because of what she is wearing – or not wearing. But don’t. Don’t play the victim. You are not a helpless victim when it comes to your eyes. You have full control over them. Exercise that control. Train them to look her in the eyes. Discipline yourself to see her, not her clothes or her body. The moment you play the victim you fall into the lie that you are simply embodied reaction to external stimuli unable to determine right from wrong, human from flesh.
Look right at me. That is a ridiculous lie.
You are more than that. And the woman you are looking at is more than her clothes. She is more than her body. There is a lot of talk about how men objectify women, and largely, it is true. Humans objectify the things they love in effort to control them. If you truly love a person, do not reduce them to an object. The moment you objectify another human – woman or man, you give up your humanity.
There are two views regarding a woman’s dress code that you will be pressured to buy into. One view will say that women need to dress to get the attention of men. The other view will say women need to dress to protect men from themselves. Son, you are better than both of these. A woman, or any human being, should not have to dress to get your attention. You should give them the full attention they deserve simply because they are a fellow human being. On the other side, a woman should not have to feel like she needs to protect you from you. You need to be in control of you.
Unfortunately, much of how the sexes interact with each is rooted in fear. Fear of rejection, fear of abuse, fear of being out of control. In some ways, the church has added to this. We fear each other because we have been taught the other is dangerous. We’ve been taught a woman’s body will cause men to sin. We’re told that if a woman shows too much of her body men will do stupid things. Let’s be clear: a woman’s body is not dangerous to you. Her body will not cause you harm. It will not make you do stupid things. If you do stupid things it is because you chose to do stupid things. So don’t contribute to the fear that exists between men and women.
A woman’s body is beautiful and wonderful and mysterious. Respect it by respecting her as an individual with hopes and dreams and experiences and emotions and longings. Let her be confident. Encourage her confidence. But don’t do all this because she is weaker. That’s the biggest bunch of crap out there. Women are not weaker than men. They are not the weaker sex. They are the other sex.
I’m not telling you to not look at women. Just the opposite. I’m telling you to see women. Really see them. Not just with your eyes, but with your heart. Don’t look to see something that tickles your senses, but see a human being.
My hope is that changing how you see women will change how you are around them. Don’t just be around women. Be with women.
Because in the end, they want to be with you. Without fear of being judged, or shamed, or condemned, or objectified, or being treated as other. And that’s not just what women want. That’s what people want.
Ultimately, it’s what you want.
Found this story and want to share with you :)
Once Krishna and Arjuna were walking towards a village. Arjuna was pestering Krishna, asking him why Karna should be considered an unparalleled Donor & not him.
Krishna turned two mountains into gold.
Then said, Arjuna, distribute these two gold mountains among villagers, but you must donate every bit of it.
Arjuna went into the village, and proclaimed he was going to donate gold to every villager, and asked them to gather near the mountain. The villagers sang his praises and Arjuna walked towards the mountains with a huffed up chest.
For two days and two nights Arjuna shoveled gold from the mountain and donated to each villager. The mountains did not diminish in the slightest.
Most villagers came back and stood in queue within minutes. Now Arjuna was exhausted, but not ready to let go of his Ego, told Krishna he couldn't go on any longer without rest.
Then Krishna called Karna and told him to donate every bit of the two gold mountains.
Karna called the villagers, and said Those two Gold mountains are yours, and walked away.
Arjuna sat dumbfounded. Why hadn't this thought occurred to him.
Krishna smiled mischievously and told him, Arjuna subconsciously, you were attracted to the gold, you regretfully gave it away to each villager, giving them what you thought was a generous amount. Thus the size of your donation to each villager depended only on your imagination.
Karna holds no such reservations. Look at him walking away after giving away a fortune, he doesn't expect people to sing his praises, he doesn't even care if people talk good or bad about him behind his back. That is the sign of a man already on the path of enlightenment.
Giving with an Expectation of a Return in the form of a Compliment or Thanks is not a Gift, then it becomes a Trade.
Give without expecting anything in Return....
Rich, 47 y.o.
Tips for men on here - one veterans insights
I have been going to Ukraine (Kiev) for about three years (from Canada) and have had three very serious relationships and probable been on about 30 dates (not one bad one). Here are some tips:
1. Stick to women in main ports like Kiev or Moscow (less travelling and costs). Favor Ukraine over Russia as you need no visa. Kiev is an amazing city and the women are beautiful and friendly.
2. NEVER EVER send money - EVER. If they ask for it, they are scamming. If they say they can get cheaper flights if they pay, they are scamming. If they won't video chat, they are scamming (give them some time of course). If they have many sad stories, drop them. Even if they are not scamming they might just be negative.
3. It is fine to go much younger, but be prepared for a less mature woman. This is obvious, but beauty doesn't last long trust me. I dated a 25 yr old for 3 months (I am 46) and though a lot of fun, at times it was very frustrating, same with one 29 yr old. There are many beautiful older women and trust me guys Ukrainian women know how to treat their men.`
4. Be prepared for cultural differences - in thought and action. Some are harmless and some will drive you nuts hahah.
5. If you do start travelling there, pick one airline and sign up for points. I am now skypriority with KLM and get upgraded to business all the time.
6. Don't be cheap.
7. Buy them small gifts and flowers. Flowers is not to say sorry in Ukraine, it is for love. Men give flowers all the time and if you don't she will wonder what she did wrong.
8. Don't drink too much. They will notice and since this is a cultural issue in Slavic countries she will drop you. Plus you might do something done.
9. Treat them with respect and like ladies. Be a gentleman. They owe you NOTHING for going there, certainly not sex. They are not "easy", they are ladies and generally well brought up and educated. You to earn their trust and their affections. Again, no matter what you spent to be there (that was your choice) they owe you NOTHING.
10. Red flags. If you see three things that bother or worry you early on, move on (arguing alot would be one, mean to strangers, etc..). You will regret it if you don't (unfortuantely - trust me on this one).
Good luck and remember be a gentleman - these women do not deserve to be treated poorly just because they are from a poorer country.
Beautiful , awesomely beautiful story sent by a friend. Felt like SHARING with you..
Often we wonder, “What did I do to deserve this?” or “Why did God have to do this to me?” Here is a wonderful explanation!
A daughter is telling her Mother how everything is going wrong, she’s failing algebra, her boyfriend broke up with her and her best friend is moving away.
Meanwhile, her Mother is baking a cake and asks her daughter if she would like a snack, and the daughter says, “Absolutely Mom, I love your cake.”
Here, have some cooking oil,” her Mother offers. “Yuck” says her daughter.
“How about a couple raw eggs?” “Gross, Mom!”
“Would you like some flour then? Or maybe baking soda?” “Mom, those are all yucky!”
To which the mother replies: “Yes, all those things seem bad all by themselves. But when they are put together in the right way, they make a wonderfully delicious cake!
God works the same way. Many times we wonder why He would let us go through such bad and difficult times. But God knows that when He puts these things all in His order, they always work for good!
We just have to trust Him and,most importantly TRUST your own FORCE. Your faith should not droop down & then eventually, they will all make something wonderful!